Monday, July 6, 2009

Yep, that was me.

As a motor cop I get the chance to meet quite a lot of people. Our customer base is huge. On occasion we come across previous "customers".

Sometimes they come out with the "Hey you gave me my last ticket" while others try to remain anonymous not knowing that they've been recognized by you until you let on that you know who they are. And some are just plain oblivious that you are the one who gave them their last ticket.

I guess that disguise of helmet, dark sunglasses, mustache really does work. I always get the "All you motorcycle cops look the same"

One bright sunny day I was parked at one of my local duck ponds when a motorists stops and tells me that there was a broken down vehicle over at Mockingbird Rd and El Corporal Dr. Mockingbird lane is what we affectionately refer to as one of our several speedways in South City.

I arrived at the intersection and luckily the broken down vehicle was on the less traveled El Corporal Dr which is actually the jurisdiction of North Town. I figured since I was there I'd handle the detail. I parked behind the disabled vehicle and had my motorcycle rear flashing emergency lights on to warn any approaching idiots that the lane was closed.

The driver was grateful to see me park behind her (now that's really a change!). Thankfully the driver was a member of AAA. Problem easily solved. I contacted dispatch and advised them that I had an owner requested AAA tow and to expedite as the vehicle was blocking the roadway.

While waiting for the tow truck the driver asked if she could ask me a question. Her question was how much was a cell phone ticket going to cost her.

For those of you not in California, we have this "hands free device" law which prohibits drivers from holding their cellphones in their hands and talking on them while driving a motor vehicle.

She relates to me that she was driving on Mockingbird Rd and had driven by a fast food restaurant where she guessed a motor cop had been "hiding" because she heard his siren a few times moments after she drove by it.

I told her I believed the base fine was something like $20 - $25. She replied "that's not bad." I told her "Yeah, but then you have all of the state, county and court enhancements." The driver asked "What does that mean?" I answered "Oh a total fine of around $147."

Obviously she was not happy to hear that news.

Now the place where she told me she was caught was one of my "duck ponds". I asked her if she remembered the motor officer's name who had given her the ticket. She told me she didn't remember but excused herself as she said "He was a real asshole!"

The oblivious driver remembered she had her copy of the citation still in the center console of her SUV. She goes and gets it, walks back to where I'm standing. She looked at the ticket and said "It was an officer 'Two Wheel Terror'" as she handed me her copy.

I looked at it and said "Yeah, it sure was. I'd recognize my signature anywhere."

You talk about a Kodak moment.......


  1. hahahahaha!!!!!open mouth insert foot!

  2. It is strangle that you don't need to put your name on the ticket.

  3. yep, that would have been worth a picture or 2

  4. OH! Thats BEAUTIFUL!!!

    Gotta love that one!

  5. How much backpeddling did she do after that?

  6. Yes, I'm with Firelady, how much backpedaling did she do after that?!?!

  7. And did she apologize for calling the Officer, who was currently saving her butt, an asshole to his face?