Sunday, January 25, 2009

You want sympathy!!!!!

Check this out, The posts you read on this blog are not the typical motorists we generally stop day to day.  A very high majority of them are very respectful.  They're usually not happy as they know the stereotype of motor cops is never giving warnings (which is very untrue).

The very rude, mean and sarcastic ones are few and far between.  They just seem more common because we stop a heck of a lot of cars.  We very rarely write about those kind, respectful motorists.

So one day I get dispatched with a fellow motor cop that there has been a traffic collision in a business parking lot.  There were no injuries but the dispatcher informed us that there was a verbal altercation going on between the two drivers.

My motor partner arrives first and he was already talking to both drivers as I rolled up.  I could see there were two females he was talking to.  One was middle aged the other a young college student home for X-mas break.  

I could see the middle aged woman was quite upset by the way she was gesticulating with her arms.  

Apparently the college student was backing out of parking spot and into the right front passenger door of a passing sedan.  The impact between the rear bumper and pass door was negligible as the only thing I saw was some disturbed dust.  

Of course the middle aged driver when I asked her to "point" out where the damage was, she began to kick the passenger door saying "It's right there, can't you see it?  What are you, blind!"
She then points out that her elderly (and I mean so elderly I thought she was driving a corpse around like "weekend at Bernie's") mother has a neuro-muscular degenerative disorder.

I asked her if she wanted me to call an ambulance for her mom.  She replies "Hell no, I take care of her seven days a week."  There were a couple of bystanders, one of which walked up and told me that she felt obligated to stop as she had witnessed the collision and said the middle aged driver verbally pounced on the college student.  

The college student who was talking to my partner was sobbing uncontrollably.  The middle aged driver tells me in a witchy tone "If I cried like that little bitch I'd be getting all of the attention too."  

I told Witchy-poo that I was talking to her so the college student driver wasn't getting all of the attention.  Of course she had a comeback, "How come she's getting all of the sympathy!"  I told her that the other driver wasn't.  

She was a citizen from the "Town" just to the north of us where most of those residents have this attitude of self entitlement (believe me I know because I used to work in the "Town", just ask Motor Cop).  

She rudely points out after a patrol car arrived on scene, "Look how many god damned cops are here, one, two, three, three goddamn cops!  I had my house alarm go off and only one "Town" cop showed up!"

I professionally replied, "Ma'am I'm sorry that the "Town Police Department" doesn't provide it's citizens with the high level of service which the "South City Police Department" provides its own citizens."

Her reply, "Fuck you! what do you know!  How come I'm not getting any sympathy!!"  I let my temper get the best of my mouth as I told her, "You want sympathy?  Look it up in the dictionary between 'shit' and syphilis'".

Oh boy, the Linda Blair exorcist head twisting move began.  I was expecting the green power puking to commence but instead she screamed "You cock sucker! What's your name!"  I politely pointed (with my middle finger) to my name patch on my jacket.  Then she demanded my badge number, which I quickly pointed (again with middle finger extended) to my cloth badge sewn onto my jacket.

Well my partner spun around when she screamed "You cock sucker!"  My partner looked at me with that look of "what did you do now?"  We've been working together for years so he knew I had said something smart ass.    

Well after all parties left the scene (some happier than others) my partner told me with fingers in his ears, "La-la-la-la, I don't even want to know what you said, la -la-la-la."  He eventually asked and I told him.

Had the bitch complained, I would have fessed up and admitted my smart ass remark.  I would have been "papered" (meaning written up for conduct unbecoming or some other violation of policy), but sometimes you just have to put people in their place.

I hope her exorcism is successful.


  1. buddy, never let them see you sweat - you lose your temper, she wins - you did exactly what she wanted - that's all she remembers about the incident now, that you lost it

    my policy is to kill 'em with kindness as long as they don't go too far - as long as I stay 100% cool, she's failed & she knows it

    I've seen her type many times before - they keep pushing & pushing & pushing until they get a reaction, so I don't give it to them

    if they get too out of line, I calmly tell them I'll have to arrest them for disorderly conduct - it's a misdemeanor here to scream obscenities in public - that almost always shuts them up & if it doesn't, I keep my promise ;)

  2. Nah, fuck 'em. You're providing a public service. Some folks just don't know they are assholes and we are morally obligated to notify them of same.